hayden's heart

and maybe the miracle was even having one moment with you...

After Hayden died, I struggled greatly with knowing that we didn't get the miracle we so desperately prayed for. I found myself full of anger that he had died, and honestly struggled when others DID get their miracle - the one where the child is about to die, but then miraculously doesn't. Let me be clear - I was grateful that they DID get their miracle, but just so confused as to why Hayden and our family didn't.

A few months after his death, I was introduced to the song 'Ronan' by Taylor Swift. Taylor had taken words from Ronan's moms' blog and formed a beautiful, touching, and incredibly emotional song about a little boy who had died from cancer - and the heartache his mother was experiencing in his absence. The words 'maybe the miracle was even having one moment with you' are in that song - and when I heard that I finally started to realize that although Hayden died, his life in any increment of time was a MIRACLE - was our miracle. It is a miracle that he was born - that he endured and survived all he did - that I was given the chance to hold him right after birth - that we brought him home - that he learned to love the life he was living.

So, maybe the miracle we had prayed for wasn't the miracle we were given - but I know without a doubt that the moments we did spend with Hayden were miracles - and we are beyond grateful for them.

We are honored to be able to gift this personalized sign to our fellow bereaved heart families in their time of grief. To apply for a personalized sign for your family or another bereaved family, please visit the application page here.

THANK YOU to The Vintage Butterfly for creating these beauties with such love. Rachel, the owner, is heart mama to heart warrior Shea.

Resources for Bereaved Families

Now I Lay Me Down To Sleep
Free professional remembrance photography for parents suffering the loss of a baby.

Molly Bears
Provides a weighted bear in the weight of your child (small fee).

When Your Friend's Baby Dies
A free downloadable e-book especially great for friends and family of the bereaved parents.

Carly Marie
Offers beautiful memorial sunset pictures with your child's name in the sand and is a great resource for bereaved family. She can also be followed on Facebook where you can keep up with the different events to honor your child.

Cooper's Cause Foundation
A non-profit organization dedicated to supporting families as they face the strain of unexpected medical expenses related to pediatric heart conditions.

Icing Smiles, Inc.
Provides birthday cakes for children whose sibling died, and they also provide memorial cakes for a deceased child for the first two years after the child's death, all free of charge and anywhere in the country.

Run for Little Hearts
A local (Kansas City) CHD 5k/10k walk/run held each year.

The CHD Awareness Quilt Project
Promotes greater public awareness of Congenital Heart Defects (CHD) while honoring the strength, courage and commitment of all those born with a CHD and their families. They will create a quilt square in your child's memory to be placed on a quilt for display.

Heart Heroes
Hand-sewn capes for heart warriors and heart angels, free of charge.

The Smallest Gift
Provides blanket and weighted heart, free of charge.

Hope's Healing Hearts
Handmade weighted heart, free of charge.

Remembering our Babies Memorial Boutique

Angel Mommy's Heart
Free hand-made, crochet hearts (Facebook page)

Congenital Heart Defects Family Association
A local Kansas City CHD organization that meets throughout the year, participates in different activities and provides care packages and blankets.

Join the Love
Creates memory blankets for bereaved families, free of charge.

Still Standing Magazine
An online magazine for bereaved parents

Alexandra's House
Perinatal and Infant Hospice. Offers support group and peer mentoring for families who have lost a baby.

Sam's Pond
Grief and loss support for parents who have experienced the loss of a baby. They have a support group that meets regularly.

3.12.12 - 8.16.12